Saturday, October 1, 2011

Changes

“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” Reinhold Niebuhr

“Change”; the scariest word in life, has always been that way. People are always afraid of change; they find security in habit; they like everything to remain the same so that calm and peace will prevail in their lives, and they won't have to think too hard.  

Whether you`re happy with what you have or not, when it comes to change, we hear the same old phrases “What if I make a mistake?” “What if it’s worse than what I have now?” “What if I fail?” New weds get really scared of marriage that they can blow the whole thing off even though they are in love. A man won`t risk quitting his job, even if it sucks; and he keeps telling himself “The Devil you know is better than the one you don’t”.  kids are afraid to grow up and to be independent, parents are afraid of their kids growing up and becoming independent… it`s just the way it is with changes.

The reason I started my article with Reinhold Niebuhr`s amazing quote is that I want to show you the difference between the changeable, and the unchangeable; I can`t change the fact that it`s summer and it`s hot out there, but I can choose to enjoy an ice-cream instead of complaining about the weather. I can`t change the fact that we grow up, but I can choose to be healthy and happy no matter how old I am. I can’t change the past, but I have the choice to have a better future. The thing is; you have the power to make any point the turning point, and you have the choice to make the change a good one.

Looking back at the last 5 years of my life, I am surprised to see that much change; I see that girl who used to be my best friend, even though we promised that it will last forever now we are like strangers; This school where I used to go every day, everyone there was my friend; now I am not allowed to be there. Amazing how the people who didn’t matter, matter and who did matter, don’t. Nothing went the way it was supposed to… or was expected to. My life changed.

I remember the day before my first day in college I cried all night because I was afraid of the change; the word “change” used to freak me out; I liked my life the way it was and I didn’t want to risk what I had. But after a while, my college years turned out to be the best years in my life. I have a crazy beautiful life and my amazing friends and I was never that happy in my school days.

So, after doing a lot of thinking, I discovered that “Things don’t change, we change”; I am the one who has been changing the whole time; I am the one who made my new life better than the old one; It was never about the people or the place it was always about me, like it`s about you. If I was the same old me, the school-girl version of me living in my new college life; It wouldn’t be the same here, I wouldn’t be as happy as I am now. But thank God, I saw the difference between what I could change and what was out of my control. I couldn’t change the fact that I grew up, and I am a big college- girl now; but I could change my attitude about it, adapt, and choose to be happy.  

 Change is not something you do, it's something you allow. The first step toward change is acceptance. Once you accept yourself, you open the door to change. Love yourself and appreciate it and you will always be happy, you will never fear the word “change” again, because no matter where life throw you… you make the change .